Recently, someone said something that stood out to me. She said “Celeste, you’ve changed.” To me, this statement is both simple, yet profound. Has anyone ever told you that? Often times when someone says that to us, we take offense, we try to defend ourselves, we play the blame game and instead say “I have not changed, you have.” But the more I thought about this, the more I realized that sometimes this statement that we often take as a negative comment, really is a compliment. Maybe you have changed, you have grown, your way of seeing things is different from when you first met that particular person, your perception of the world and what you see as important is not the same as it was before….and maybe that is okay. Maybe it actually is a good thing! ❤
I am not the same person I was ten years ago and I am actually happy about this. When I was younger, around 20 years old, I thought when I get older (around 26 or 27), I will get married, have kids, get a nice house, have a car and a good job and eventually retire after 33 1/3 years with a good pension. That is what I wanted from life, that is what I thought life was about. That is what I thought will make me happy. However, although I still want to have some of these things, I have to begun to see that there is so much more to life than this. These items (or milestones) do not define who I am as a person, they do not define whether I am living a good and pleasing life, they do not make me happy. I could be happy with them and I could be happy without 🙂
So what are some of the changes I have made in my life and what are some of the lessons that I have learnt:
You Can’t Please Everyone: This is the biggest lesson that I have learnt. People will always have an opinion about what you are doing, what you will do and what you have done. Someone will get upset with whatever decision you make. Don’t make a decision because you think it will make someone else happy, analyze the situation and make a decision based on the information you have at hand and what will make you happy.
It Is Okay To Say No: Often times we feel pressured by friends and family to attend different events or functions when we really would rather not. Maybe we just want to sit at home and read a book or we have work to do or chores to do. It is okay to say no sometimes, not all the time thou (you really should get out of your house for things other than work or going to the grocery every now and then) but you don’t have to be attend every function or event that you are invited to. It is okay to say no sometimes.
Trust Your instincts, Believe In Yourself, Be Willing To Take Risks: Many times we find ourselves not starting certain projects or doing tasks because we lack self confidence, we are afraid to fail, we think we may not be good enough or we afraid of what other persons will say. This type of thinking will get you nowhere in life, you will live and survive but you won’t excel. You have to be willing to take risks, to push yourself beyond your boundaries and to have the confidence to know that if you try and fail you could and should try again. “A quitter never wins and a winner never quits” by Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich.
The importance of constant learning. When do you stop learning? Is it after high school? When you complete your undergraduate degree? When you get a PhD? The truth is you should never stop learning cause life never stops teaching. Everyday brings new challenges and new lessons to be learned. It our job to pay attention, to learn from our mistakes and to make our todays better than our yesterdays. I also personally find it important to read in particular self-development books or uplifting books, books that teach you something and expand your knowledge base. Read …read …. read or if you don’t like reading….watch documentaries or listen to podcasts, whatever is your source of information. But never stop learning! You always wanted to learn Spanish, why not start today? It is never to late to learn something new. “The way of success is the way of continuous pursuit of knowledge.” by Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich.
The Importance of Hobbies: This is another important life lesson. As we get older, we get jobs, have families and end up so busy that we tend to forget to do something just for ourselves…we forget the importance of self-care. We forget to have our own hobbies or things that we are passionate about. I think this is integral to happiness…..find times to do the things you enjoy even if it just for a few minutes every week. For me this is in the form of hobbies such as photography, reading and hiking. I also enjoy a good party every now and then 🙂 I am a Trini after all 😎
Rest, Yoga and Meditation: Whenever you travel on an airplane during the safety briefing, they always tell you to place your air mask on before you help anyone else. You are no use to anyone if you are operating on a with a 10% battery. Yoga, proper rest and meditation helps recharge your mind, body and spirit. It is essential.
There is an old saying that change is the only thing constant in life. I wholeheartedly believe in this statement and I embrace it. Everyday we should strive to be a better person than we were the day before, we should change…bit by bit…every day…So next time someone says you have changed, especially when you know all the work you have been doing on yourself, just say thank you because you know that you are growing, you are changing…. and that’s a good thing 🙂